A Whole New Level of Anxiety

Sometimes all you can do is put one foot in front of the other, pray that your footsteps are guided, and have faith as you take each step. Our summer has been filled with Doctor’s Appointments, Hospitals, Stress, Fear,Tests, Blood Draws, and Anxiety. Blue got a headache on June 17th and we still don’t know completely what is going on with her little body.

There is nothing like watching your child’s health go down hill and not knowing why. Nothing like waiting for test results only to be told to take your child up to the Hospital because they have no idea what is wrong with her. We spent several hours in the emergency room before being admitted. It is heartbreaking to watch my daughter go through this. They found some infections and released us.

During follow up tests visits they have found more wrong. More tests, more time in the hospital, a surgery, shots twice daily to treat blood clot. More anxiety as Blue is crying and screaming, “No, Mommy, no, not yet please.” as I have to give her a shot so we can work towards being discharged. We get it down and thing and improving, but more anxiety as they give me a long list of things to watch for. And a long list of restrictions.

Once again, more exams and more problems found. More anxiety as Blue cries and says she just wants to be done. More anxiety as we deal with insurance. More anxiety as we wait for more tests to be done and more specialist to be seen.

We have seen miracles and blessing. Praying for more. I wish my faith was stronger than my fear and anxiety.


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